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| June.Today is June 1st. its insane how fast the year is going. in just 9 days it will be me and mike's 5months! that' one month away from half a year! last night we had mike's mom over for dinner. that was fun, especially the baby bird that got stuck on our porch. lol my dad chased it for a few minutes trying ot pick t up but it hopped away every time. so I tried and it went right into my hands... the the cute little bugger wouldn't get out! haha I tried to put him on the bird bah but he just closed his eyes like "nah, I think I'll take a nap now" and only got off when my mum tried to get a close up pic of him. he was so cute :)
anyway... off to do my makeup and then school :P
<3
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| Peopletonight I thought a lot about the two most important people to me (besides family)... and things I hope they know.
The first is my best friend. she's been my best friend since 10th grade. we used to be inseparable, but with the whole distance thing that's kinda hard now. I miss her so much that sometimes I seriously cry. when she does come home its usually for a holiday and I end up having plans with my family and mike's family adn I'm super busy. I feel like she thinks I don't want to see her and that couldn't be farther from the truth. I cant wait until she can come home for n reason and we can just hang out and have fun like we used to. do nothing, talk crap, share secrets, bake, stay up all night, wander around in fields scaring the crap out of ourselves, and of course beach trips. I miss my best friend, and no one could ever replace her. no matter how old we get or how far away we move.
The second is my boyfriend. we're going on 5months now... I couldn't be happier. he's better to me than anyone I've met. better yet, he knows how my mind works 90% of the time and handles me pretty well. he still has a few sides he hasnt experienced, but that's a good thing. he brings out the best in me, and mabe he won't ever see those sides, or at least not directed towards him? only time will tell. he's so understanding (which is why he may never see those sides, he calms me down long before I get to that point). he treats me like a princess. and I trust him... well as much as I can trust a person. I just... he makes me feel so happy. secure. whole.
witohut thest two people my life would pretty much suck....
oh, and Eli. he's my everything 
and speaking of people I miss, this summer is so far lacking some bs :(
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| hey you...hey you, I love you! I am so happy you found someone who treats you like you deserve.
hey you, I forgave you... but I have not forgotten. I could never trust you again. I am happy you found someone to love and that your life is going well.
hey you, sometimes I still think about you, I hope you're doing well. I could ask but it's over and talking now would just be awkward.
hey you, lately I miss you like crazy. sometimes I think about messaging you and seeing if we can get together sometime you're home. but I'm afraid that would be awkward and that would hurt me too much.
hey you, you are gone. never to be on here again. I am glad you are gone. I am glad the way things worked out. I'm glad she knows. I'm sorry I ever did it. I'm sorry I wasted my time on you. I'm sorry I gave you such a big head because you are nothing special. I wish she'd see that... mostly, I am hurt and angry at the last month or some of our "friendship." I don't hate many people but I hate you.
hey you, I miss you. things aren't the same most of the time... I guess that's how life goes. you'll always be my bestest friend. I'll always be here for you and hope you will be too.
hey you, I'm glad we found each other. I don't want to lose you. you feel so different. you treat me so different. you make me feel happier than I've been in a long time.one of my biggest fears is pushing you away... I know I can be hard to love, but please don't give up on me if I become a lot to handle. you're the best thing that's happened to me in a long time.
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| Things I don't understand...There are lots of things I don't understand, but this is mainly about Valentine's Day...
1. The whole general concept... now mind you I'm not saying I don't appreciate hearing how much everyone loves and and getting candy and stuff, but what is the point? who decided that February 14 was going to be special? why do we even need it? aren't anniversaries enough?
2. Bears, cards, stuffed animals, ect. The stupid ones that just have a heart and say something like "I luv u!" sooooo lame! no thought goes into those. they just take up space. I never understood my friends when they brag about how their boyfriends got them huge teddy bears with a heart or something.... whoop de do! he can pick out a $20 bear from rite aid, that's something to be proud of. No... get me my favorite candy, get me a card that says soething meaningful, flowers, take me to dinner... but really, a bear that sings elvis or something? that's just sad. I'd rather get nothing.
3. Proposing on Valentines Day.... wow. that is SO creative. that obviously took tons of thought and planning. how did you manage to think of such a meaningful day?! 'nough said.
hnm... how did this turn into a rant? lol
good things to know about me (I think EVERY girl should cut her guy a break and make this known BEFORE Valentines Day... or any event he might be expected to present you with something thoughtful and sweet. it's only fair)
1. My favorite flower is white cala lillies follow closely by peach roses
2. My favorite candy is Ferro Roches, also acceptable are sour gummy worms, cinnamon hearts, fudge, assorted chocolates, and caramels
3. Stuffed animals are lame. unless there is something that makes it special and means you put thought into picking it out, avoid. stick with candy or flowers, or if you want something creative, you can never go wrong by buying me a betta or a ds game ;)
4. I hate steak/ranch house restaurants. no texas road house, no outback... ugh. I am fine with most places, but definitely not those. asian food = amazing
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